Black & White Vol. 116

The last few months have been a drain on my sense of self, to speak openly. I've been wrestling with this thing we call purpose, searching left and right for it as I adjust to a much more offline lifestyle. While I have no intention of reverting to that prior internet super-highway approach to daily life, I find myself wandering and groping in the dark for something that is worthwhile, and reevaluating what photography itself means for me.

In search of that, I decided to have a go at a two day acting course (Acting Essentials) run by NIDA at QUT Kelvin Grove. It was refreshing to be amongst a room of (adult) students again, and to be thoroughly challenged by the notion of acting as a character different to the one I have grown so good at over my thirty years on Earth. I came out of it not knowing whether to do more or move onto something else, so I signed up for the next step, an eight week Acting Techniques course. It's so different to my usual creative outlets that I find myself drawn to the idea of trying to overcome that challenge, even if I'm not immediately rushing out to "become an actor", so to speak.

At the same time, I'm working on a local gallery showing opportunity that has presented itself, which is exciting as someone who only recently got into printing last year and has never exhibited any work before at all. I feel busy and not busy at the same time as wrestling with personal battles and finding new purpose, and I frankly can't foresee the result of it all in the near future.

It's kind of exhausting and I'm looking forward to the time when some feeling of true momentum returns.